Would have preferred this type of swinger

Read Part 1 First

My husband and I left the pool area and headed down to the beach so we could swim in the ocean and laugh at what we just had witnessed. Well, who comes bounding down the beach in our direction? All three couples. We had been spotted and they were coming in for the kill.

I swam closer to Chris and looked over his left shoulder. I whispered in his ear, “Please look behind you and tell me that what you’re seeing and what I think I’m seeing are the same thing.” He casually turned around and said, “Yeah, that’s pretty much what I think it is.” The guy from Missouri was holding the girl from Missouri by her shoulders as she floated on her back…with her bathing suit bottoms off…while the girl from PA was, how should I say this delicately, pleasuring her orally. Yep, she went down south. She was eating at the Y. She was diving for muff. I think you get the idea. Chris went over to them and said, “You guys need to take that to the room. This is a public beach and there are kids around.” It was four in the afternoon. They laughed and one of them said, “We’re just trying to have a good time.”

Apparently we were the party poopers. We headed in the opposite direction and were met by the AK couple. He engaged me in conversation (or was trying to) as his wife wrapped her legs around my husband. Chris threw his arms in the air to show me that he was having nothing to do with this. I heard her say to him, “You probably came out of the womb fucking. Well you’ve met your match today!” She leaned in like she was going to kiss him and he pulled away. Her husband looked at me and said, “Does that bother you?” When I said that it did, he replied, “Why? You know who he’s going home with tonight. Why should that bother you?” I just looked at him and said, “It just does. Now either you can tell her to get off of him or I’m gonna pull her the fuck off of him!” His eyed widened and he called to his wife, “Baby! Baby! Stop!”

Well, she did. But not before pulling off her bathing suit top and pushing Chris’s face in her boobs. She pulled him away and said, “Whattya think of these tits?” He looked at me and then looked at her and said, “Um, they’re okay.” She flipped and screamed, “OKAY?! As much as I paid for them they should be more than okay!” and then kicked him in the nuts. By that time, we knew that we were in over our heads. The girl from PA swam over to me with the girl from AK beside her and tried pulling me into their three-way kiss. When I pulled away from her, she just looked at me. I said, “I don’t judge, but I’m just not into that. Sorry.”

As I let the girls down easy I looked about twenty feet behind them. Having sex in the water was the couple from Missouri. With the guy from Arkansas standing within a foot of them coaching, “Oh yeah, keep ‘er going’ Keep ‘er goin’. Don’t stop. Let ‘er finish. Take ‘er to the end.” That was it. I couldn’t take any more of this. It had gone beyond creepy and freaky. I looked at Chris and he had the same look in his eyes as I had. While we were saying goodbye to the guy from PA, coach came over and grabbed me by the wrists. “Where are you goin’? We’re just havin’ fun.” I told him that it was late and we needed to get ready for dinner. He looked at Chris and said, “I’m not gonna fuck your wife. I mean, I would fuck her, she’s fuckable, but I’m not gonna do that. But how would you like to see my wife and your wife get it on?”

By that point I wanted to vomit, but he probably would’ve been into that too. Chris and I made a hasty retreat to the room and we started laughing. “The very first people that you ever meet and introduce to me on vacation are swingers. Nice job.” I  was just happy that it was our last day and we wouldn’t have to see them again, ever. We went to dinner and hung out that evening, still trying to comprehend what had gone on. The next morning, we went down to the buffet and Chris left a little before I did so he could get our bags. While I was leaving the restaurant, I was thinking how lucky I was not to see them there. “Virginia? Is that you?” For the love of Abraham! It was the guy from Alabama wanting to chat it up. I shook my head no and quickly walked through the door and into the safety zone.

Nope. Not this type of swingers.

As outgoing as I am among people that I know, if you get me around strangers I’m an instant introvert. However, if you get some alcohol in me, that changes (as evidenced in other W.T.T.). While vacationing in Cancun this past June, my husband thought it would be funny to enter me in a beer drinking contest at our resort. There were only two problems with this: 1. I don’t really drink and 2. beer isn’t my drink of choice. But like the little trooper that I am, I took one for the team and chugged. Thankfully it was how quickly one could drink the beer and not how much. I came in second to a large Mexican “woman.” I say “woman” because she had a mustache and I swear she was a man in drag. Anyway, here’s where it gets a little ugly.

After the contest, I decided to swim over to the bar and get a beer for the husband and a pina colada for myself. As I was sitting on the bar stool waiting for my bevies, a guy about my age asked if I wanted to do a shot with him and some other people. Naturally I said yes. After the group shot-taking, he asked this kid next to me how old he was (did I mention I was tailed by a youngster on my way over?) and the kid said that he was 20. “Get the fuck outta here! I’m old enough to be your daddy!” Then the guy asked how old I was and when I told him, he asked if I was alone or with someone. I pointed out my husband in the crowd and he told me to come back over because he “needed to party” with people his own age.

I was so proud of myself! I swam back over and insisted that my dear husband meet my new pals. He was reluctant at first, but I insisted. When we got back to the bar, my buddy was still there with his wife and two other couples. Couple #1 was from Arkansas. He was a K9 officer and she was an eighth grade English teacher. Couple #2 was from Missouri and I have no idea what either of them did. Couple #3 was from Pennsylvania. She was a student and he worked for the Flyers. Good people just enjoying the sun and conversation. Suddenly I looked over and saw the women in the group showing their boobs to each other. Okay, whatever. No big deal. Granted this was a family-friendly resort and we were next to the kiddie pool, but oh well.

A few minutes later, I looked over to see the woman from PA licking the nipple of the woman from AR. Whoa! But we were having a nice conversation with the gentlemen from the group so I ignored them. A few minutes more passed and then I saw the woman from Missouri full-out making out with the one from PA. Um , okay. I’m not close-minded and who am I to judge so I still didn’t say anything. It eventually got so bad that the manager came out and asked the ladies to leave the pool area. My husband and I laughed about it and headed to the beach since the show was over. But we were soooooo wrong!

Next Time: Things get a little NSFW